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depression mode??? emo baa....
boiboi scribble on Thursday, December 27, 2007 @ 12:03 AM
haiz.

well kinda of sad todae. maybe not really laa. morning to afternoon ok leh kinda of happy. coz did something that i dun normally can do after entering SIT Club. its a pity that i din take out the instrument to play. kinda of miss playing with the band and under the new conductor. but sacrifices needed to be made i think. coz i dunno how to manage my time well enough yet. hahahahs sian lor. well later meeting on the open house and know my department le. yongliang din come todae so i pretty sian todae. well other than that i played game with jeffrey. sian lor lose 5 - 14. sian. well later do other stuff then daoli came. he brought goods from korea. wala thankz man. the seedweed indeed nice to eat n i took quite a bit piece. woot. n i wanna eat kimchi. but he brought 2 packets onli hence i haf to ask and buy from either eeling or ruby le.

feeling down. din really do much. sian. wondering wad am i doing recently. lazy. sleep and eat. play and spent money like water. forgetful. irresponsible. wondering why am i not like the past. willing to buy 3 packets of tissues for $1; willing to donate any amount to the donation drive; willing to give up on my food portion for the others.... well todae i took the most seedweeds and din let the rest eat. how greedy and inconsiderate. wondering why i bring extra shirt whereby most of the time i din even need to change coz din do much either. haiz.... feeling that life nowadays is so so so sian. wondering wad happen to mi. i dunno. im confused. i hate it. i dun like it. im not myself. im lost. no target, no future plans. not sporty not energetic. for the past 3 months, i haf been lying to myself. i cannot take it sooner or later. perhaps its about time. time for mi to break down. time for mi to smash the bottle into pieces. time for mi to do something that i really wan to do.

well wondering when is the last time i cry, when is the last time i enjoyed myself, when is the last time i fight for the things i really wan and treasure, when is the last time i..... haiz why wondering all these. i dunno. sleep baa... and forget everything. coz all these wont come back again. wont come back. again.

a glass of concentrated martell will do the trick indeed.